Cool Entertaining When the Heat Is On - Big Y® World Class Market®

Advice from Dr. Sonya Friedman, From Big Y's Colors of Summer magazine, June 2004

Whether planning a casual backyard barbecue for 25 or a formal wedding for 100, entertaining can be very stressful.

It's all in the details, and few of us are schooled in the art of party planning, so anxiety can become a daily occurrence. However, there are many things you can do to help stay cool and confident. In fact, the following tips can make you look like the social hostess of the year while staying cool as a cucumber before the event - and even having a good time at your own party.

1 Make a plan. Visualize the actual party. What do you see? Write it all down - how many tables and chairs? What foods do you want? Consider the silverware, tablecloths, and decorations. Do you need to have people helping? List every single detail on paper as you visualize yourself doing a walk-through of your own event, working backward from the event to your list.

2 Weigh fantasy against practicality. Sure, you want things to be magazine-picture perfect, but is it less work when you use paper plates for that barbecue? Should you invite others to bring a dish? Do you really need the expensive flowers on every table? Is your guest list manageable in the space you have?

3 Ask for help. Don't be shy about assigning jobs to others. Give every family member a role to play so each has a stake in the outcome. If someone volunteers to help you set up or clean up afterwards, don't turn down the offer - a simple thank you makes a neighbor or friend feel closer to you.

4 Have a work schedule for the week before. Know day-by-day what you need to do to get ready. Minimize last-minute details. Check the weather forecast. Always order a little extra in case a guest asks to bring an unexpected visitor.

5 The night before review your to-do list with family. Sometimes another set of eyes and ears will think of something that's been overlooked. Appoint an emergency go-fer in the event someone needs to go to the store for a last-minute product. Take a relaxing bath, eat a light dinner and get a good night's sleep.

6 Day of smile and enjoy. If you are tense, everyone present will pick up on your discomfort. If you have a good time, a good time will be had by all!

Dr. Sonya Friedman is an author and clinical psychologist in private practice. Look for her latest book "Take It From Here: How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be."